Christmas Break

I'm flying out in a couple of hours to go back to Michigan for the next week and a half. Good old Michigan... 10 degrees, three feet of snow, and a 28.8 dialup... No, I'm not looking foward to leaving Florida for this and Yes, this blog will be neglected. As a parting gift, I'll leave you some awesome facts on Mr. T.

Every time a church bell rings, Mr. T pities a fool.

When Mr. T folds his arms, the U.S. Terror Alert Level is raised to gold.

The last man who made eye contact with Mr. T was Ray Charles.

Mr. T speaks only when necessary. His main form of communication is folding his arms and slowly shaking his head. And regardless of the situation, he is always understood.

Mr. T hates playing 'Rock Paper Scissors' because he doesn't believe anything could beat rock. He always chooses rock, and when someone throws paper, he says,"I win." If someone is foolish enough to dispute this, he takes his clenched fist and punches them in the face, then says, "I thought your paper would protect you."

Children are afraid of the dark. Dark is afraid of Mr. T.

Mr. T doesn't pity anyone who likes the Black Eyed Peas. He just kills them.

Mr.T once punched Chuck Norris at the exact moment he roundhouse kicked Mr.T in the chest. the result was the 80's.

Mr T. and Chuck Norris decided to spar, they travelled to the only safe place in the Universe, the beginning of time. They bowed to each other and Chuck launched in with a roundhouse kick. Mr. T blocked it, and the resulting pressure wave is commonly called the Big Bang.

Mr T's chains are not made of gold, they are actually made of curium, one of the heaviest elements in existence. They were put there by the CIA to slow him down, and you're lucky they do, fool.

When creating the alphabet, Mr. T placed the letters M, R, and T in seperate areas so people could learn to read and spell without fear.

Mr. T has had some interesting bowel movements; some of which include: Steve Urkel and Australia.

Mr. T doesn't breathe, air just hides in his lungs for protection.

5 out of 5 doctors recommend not pissing off Mr. T.

Human females have two X chromosomes. Males have an X and a Y. Mr. T has three Ys and a T. He's more man than you'll ever be.

Mr. T is the reason the sky is blue. Don't ask stupid questions.

Mr. T once captured Bigfoot, but released him after he shaved the beast and realized that it was just Chuck Norris walking around naked in the woods.

Mr. T invented fools. Realizing the magnitude of his folly, he then created Pity.

Mr. T once ate four 72 oz. steaks in 12 minutes. He spent the first 5 minutes laughing at the fact it takes Chuck Norris fifteen minutes to eat three.

23. That's the number of people Mr. T has pitied in the time it has taken you to read this sentence.

When Mr. T received his star on Hollywood's Walk of Fame, he made his hand prints after the cement was dry.

Mr. T is not black. It's just that the sun is to afraid to shine on him.

Mr. T coined the phrase, "I see dead people," after the waiting staff at Denny's forgot his birthday.

On the A-team, Face , Haniabal, and Murdoch were all masters of disguise. Mr T didn't have to wear a disguise. The bad guys didn't recognize him out of fear.

Mr. T CAN eat only one Lays potato chip.

Mr. T always drives on the right side of the road, no matter where he is in the world.

There are only four horsemen of the apocalypse, because Mr. T is going to walk.

Mr. T. does not break wind. He destroys it.

Mr. T doesn't need an ATM card. He just walks up to the machine, crosses his arms, stares at it, and money comes out.

Mr. T was once involved in a head-on car crash, and he was the only survivor. Mr. T was walking at the time.